Farm Life

We live on 10.5 acres of wooded and most of the time un-mowed land. To say we live on a farm would be inaccurate. We live BY a farm so we get the sights (trucks, trailers, tractors, barns), smells (cow poop), and sounds (cows, chickens, donkeys).

I think it would be correct to say we live in the country. When I think of country life I think of no neighbors for a mile or so. WRONG!!! We have neighbors in our back pocket, or front if you want to get technical about it. They are right next door and across the street. So close I can hear the neighbor kids playing basketball.

So much for peaceful country life. At least we don't have people driving by with stereos so loud our windows rattle and fire trucks 6 blocks away.

I have lived on farms/ranches before and did not really appreciate how quiet it was. I enjoyed the quiet of course but did not appreciate it.

As I have mentioned, we have 3 dogs, 2 cats and 1 teenage boy.  He is pretty much a slug who lives in his room :-)  Not really but I like to tease him.
With 3 dogs and 2 cats comes a certain amount of chaos, stress, hilarity and mess.

Our dogs have figured out that free range country life is bad ass. When we first moved here in August 2013, they would take off and explore for miles. They have since set parameters, which I am not privy to, and 89.73267% of the time they are in the yard or on the deck.

The other portion of the time is spent playing or laying in a pond or some body of water they have found.

This was not always the case!

Week 1: Truman comes home happy as a dog who just rolled in death or shit or both! Holy cow it was awful!!!  I am on poop duty (doodie) since I won't have a complete and total barf-o-rama. (Stand By Me).
I had to tie him to a pole and wash him 3 times and his face still smelled mildly of cow crap.

After we got Talia and she started running with Truman and Avery things got even more interesting or disgusting, whatever.
All of a sudden random body parts started showing up. None human that we could tell.
A cow leg here, I am talking a WHOLE leg! Complete with a knee, fur and a hoof. A deer leg there, same scenario. Oh and look! A SPINE! How fun!!! Talia tries to bring the spine in the house so here I am having a tug of war with a SPINE and explaining to the puppy that "no spine in the house".  We have jaw bones with teeth, hip bones, more spine, a dead snake (in DECEMBER), an ENTIRE opossum skeleton with a bit of meat left(smelly), cow pelts, deer pelts, rabbit pelts, and rabbit bodies. Talia was running around with a rabbit head like it was a ball! Dead moles, a couple of squirrels, 3 sets of antlers and more cow and deer legs than we can count. I am certain I am missing something from this list.

With all of the parts Talia has given us we could make Frankencow. Complete with a spine, rabbit head, fur and antlers. It would be an interesting creature.

I forgot to mention the skunk incidents. 2 of em so far. Last night Avery got a face full of skunk. She looked like a recruit on pepper spray day! :-)

As I sit here writing this I hear the dogs come thumping up the deck so I look up and what do I see???? Talia with a WHOLE rabbit! It is fresh and she is happy!

Well I gotta go and take the rabbit away form Talia, mean mommy!

Did I mention Talia has done all of this in only 7 months!!!

Mother's Day, Father's Day and Coconut Pie Day

They all mean the same thing to me...NOTHING.  For me they are just days and I am ok with that. Of course I had a mom and dad. Two of each actually. Birth mom and dad and adopted mom and dad. You might be thinking to yourself that I am a lucky kid. WRONG WRONG WRONG.  Birth mom wasn't "selfless" and loved me so much she let go, she was lazy and selfish and didn't want the hassle. She also waited for 5 years.  OH but your adoptive parents must have LOVED you. Eh doubt it.
Yeah they adopted me (it was birth moms sister and brother in law) but they didn't want me any more than she did. What about birth dad???? He was GONE. Off to the military he went and I didn't meet him until I was 16. 

I am struggling with the whole
 "Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you."  Exodus 20:12  

I had "parents" if you will, but I did not have parents.  I have finally made peace with that fact and I have learned forgiveness for one of them, still struggling with the other.  When these holidays come around I feel like I am having this shoved down my throat and while I agree that it is good to acknowledge your parents and the love they have for you I also know that there are parents out there that do NOT deserve acknowledgment. 

That being said I will celebrate these two days with my new family, the only one I have really had, and honor "mom" for raising her children to be the wonderful people they are. I am happy to have them in my life. I will celebrate "dad" in June because for the first time in my life I feel as though I am genuinely cared about and they really are happy to have me in their lives.

They are NOT my parents, they are not even my in-laws but I love them as they though they are. In my heart they are and for me that is what counts. It took me 37 years to get a mom and dad but hey, the ones I got are pretty spectacular :-)

What about coconut pie day???? Here is the thing about coconut pie, I hate it. I won't celebrate it. EVER.  If I had to choose between eating a piece of coconut pie or giving Dylan a foot rub I would choose the foot rub. I don't like feet :-(  That is a story for another day :-)

SO for all of the moms out there who really love their kids and take care of them I salute you! 

Dogs, Who knew?

Dogs are HILARIOUS!  Unless they are channeling Cujo and trying to eat your face off.

Well duh Theresa! That is part of the reason people love dogs.  Yeah well I did not know this until Marc and I got together. 

I hated dogs, ok not really the dog but the idea of dogs.  They bark, lick, jump, and NEED you. UGH!! No thanks! I didn't want or need the constant "mom" "mom" "mom" of a dog because unlike children dogs do not grow up and move out. Nope you are stuck with the perpetual toddler for the rest of their lives.  

Enter Avery.  Dylan WANTED a dog so bad and Marc liked dogs so it wasn't that big of a deal. Avery took a few days to get her name because we just could NOT think of anything, plus she was a puppy that hadn't shown her personality yet.  Well her full name is Darth Avery Tan Lord of the Sith Empire (the boys are big Star Wars fans, I love Darth).  She has proven many times over that we named her correctly! Wow! Can we say ubber bitch :-)  She is funny! Her attitude and personality won us over and we just love her snarkyness!

Well poor little Avery puppy was lonely, playing in the big back yard all by herself so Marc said she needed a friend. He saw Truman on the news, Helping Hands features pets, and fell in love. He said "I want that dog". 

I was not impressed. It's a dog, so what... Truman (the name helping hands gave him) cracks me up on a daily basis. He drove me out of my freaking mind when we lived in town though. He is so neurotic and had TONS of energy to burn. Once we moved to the country he has turned in to the happiest, goofiest, trashiest (long hair) dog. We LOVE it!!

So there we were, Marc had Truman and Dylan had Avery and I didn't care and was fine with both dogs but not a dog lover.  

One day I was getting my nails done and my friend Michelle mentioned a person she knew found a boxer on the side of the road and they could not keep it. They called the vets in the area and no one reported a missing dog. They posted it on Facebook and nothing. Marc had talked about the boxers he had previously and how great the breed was so I told him about this dog and asked if we could go see it. It was a girl.  

His stipulation was that it can't have long nasty nails, tumors(Boxers are known for them), nasty teeth  or nipples of a mother dog.

We pull up to the house the lady opens the gate and I lost my heart. The very second I saw her I KNEW she was MINE and I was HERS!!!  My Maggie. She was the most beautiful dog I had ever laid eyes on. In reality she was NOT the most beautiful dog. She was white with brown eyes, had tumors, long icky nails, nasty nasty teeth/gums, and she had had puppies.  She was dirty and scrawny and I was in love!!!  

That was the moment I got it, I know now why people love dogs.  I could not wait to get my baby home and start giving her the best life ever!  I was so excited to show her to the family.  They were not as enamored by her as I was :-)  In fact one of them asked "does that dog have a glass eye?"  

Her breath would make you pass out and her toots could clear a giant living room with 15' ceilings but she was perfect! She had the BEST attitude, unless you were a kitten then she tried to eat you.

I could go on for days about this girl!!! She was my soul mate! Marc is my true love and I have to remind him and Dylan that I do love them more than Maggie, or at least as much :-).   

We still have Avery and Truman and have since added Talia to the pack but none of them even come close to making my heart as happy as my beautiful Maggie.  July 26, 2014 will be one year since I said good bye. I think of her daily and cry often but most of the time I smile and laugh remembering how happy she was and how happy she made me.

Avery

 Truman

Talia

Maggie