I am not Snow White

Went to Menards yesterday, twice. (we are in the middle of remodeling the house so we are either at Menards or Home Depot)  On the second trip I got a bird feeder and some food, nothing fancy, just the kind you stick to your door.  I got home stuck it to the front door, which we rarely use, and filled it up. This is somewhat new for me as it has been YEARS since I purchased bird food. I got the midwest mix.

I hopped ( who am I kidding, it was scooted, rolled and trudged) out of bed this morning to the chirping of birds, left the windows open last night!  BRRRRR
I went to the front door expecting to feel like Snow White when she opens her curtains and birds come say hello.

There it is!!! My bird feeder! Full and ready for all those hungry little suckers that I watched yesterday under the lilac bush........nothing. NOTHING!!!!!!!  Are you serious?  I can hear you out there for crying out loud! I see them in the neighbors yard on the farm implements! I am so intent on the freaking bird feeder that the little scrape, pluck, thunk sound on the kitchen screen next to me barley sinks in. I look and there is a female blue jay. Of course she is looking at the giant moth that is on the next screen over. She assesses the situation and leaves.  A few minutes later she's back and she snatches up her big juicy moth for breakfast :-(

I am not sad about the moth, I am sad that these birds seem to be too stupid to find a FULL BIRD FEEDER!!!!!  It is RIGHT THERE!!!.

I know nothing about birds, ok not nothing cause EVERYONE knows SOMETHING about birds. Am I supposed to play hard to get? Is it to soon after offering them this delicious meal to expect them to start cramming to the front door like this is some cool bird night club? I got nothing! I am annoyed. What is wrong with the wildlife in this place?  Just yesterday I rescued a snake from the middle of the road, apparently he did NOT want to be rescued because the little sucker tried to bite me, several times.  I got a stick and shewed him off the road, the whole time he had his head up talking crap and trying to bite.
I would have grabbed him had I known what kind he was. Yeah it would have hurt but how cool would THAT have been?  "Hey Marc, can you get this snake off me?"
Marc didn't think that would have been cool so I am now banned form harassing/saving snakes until I know what they are. Ok, ok that sounds like a good idea! Geez

Back to the birds...still nothing. Zip, zilch, nada, ZERO!  Jerks